DIRTY SECRETS IN MARRIAGE...

-
I've heard stuffs like, "don't check your husband's phone if you don't want to develop hypertension."  What is in that phone that you cannot check? Excuse me brother, what secret conversations are you having that your wife must not see or hear about? Who are you having secret chats with as a wife? Why are you deleting your chats, what is in the chat you are deleting?
Emotional affair is every where! The moment you start having secret admiration for someone who is not your spouse, you are lusting and you need to deal with it. You can't carry fire in your bossom and not be burnt! The only solution to dealing with the affair is to block that person from your life. To keep talking to them with the false hope you will deal with the lust is to live in a fool's paradise. You will one day have sex with that person, GUARATEED! Flee youthful lust is what the Bible says, it!s not just for singles, it's for the married as well.
There is one sure fire proof safe guard against adultery, it is COMPLETE OPENNESS to your spouse. Never have any conversation with any mortal your spouse must not know about. 
There should be no secret opposite sex friend any where. The two of you have now become one. Whatever belongs to you belongs to them, your phone, tablet, laptop, etc belong to them. You should be able to go to sleep whenever they go through your phone.
Some men develop high blood pressure the moment the wife picks his phone. Some share the same pass word with their spouse but have secret chats on facebook messenger! The wife can log into his account as often as possible but will never see those secret chats. Only the ones he wants to show  will be there to see. A marriage built on lies never lasts, it's a matter of time, it will soon explode and raze down to ashes!
Lots of women too are in emotional affairs. You discuss your marital problems with male friends and have secret chats with them. They capitalize on your info and meet the needs your husband is unable to meet in your life, you begin to admire them, have fondness for them, go out with them and eventually have sex, at the end you become broken, shattered, bitter and angry at yourself for being so cheap!
Guard your heart with all diligence is what the Holy Book says. I do not have any secret conversation with anyone my husband does not know about. Sooner or later, he will get to read the messages.
Those who send me flirty messages are sending it to both of us because we both read it and he teaches me how to respond. I do not keep friends he does not approve of. He is quick to inform me  if any woman shows interest in him, we both discuss how to deal with it and rest the case. We watch each other's backs. We monitor each other, we help each other stay pure. That is what marriage is all about.
If you truly love your spouse you will be opened and accountable to them. You will allow them help you wherever you are weak with the opposite sex. You will not only be naked in body but heart and mind as well.
It's TRUE INTIMACY when you can honestly open your heart to your spouse: "honey, I think I'm getting attracted to so and so person, please help me out" and they will not criticize, judge or condemn you but rather, take you by the hand and help you out of the valley of emotional confusion. That is what true intimacy really is, that is what marriage is, that type of union is rare, it s real heaven on earth. "And they were both naked and not ashamed..." (Genesis 2:25).
I wish you bliss eternal in your marriage. God bless you. Cheers!
© Seun Oladele, 2017

Comments

  1. Jonah1 December 2017 at 04:27

    Simply excellent. No additions, No subtractions.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown1 December 2017 at 10:05

    Excellent.....i have got to share
    this....... I would love to be your editor though?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unknown3 December 2017 at 23:59

    Great! Openness is key. I'll just add that the each party should make it easy for the other to open up. The reason why spouses don't open up to themselves is because one party might use the information shared against the other. So he/she tries handling it privately. There should be openness but then understanding is important.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jonah5 December 2017 at 10:35

      Much more important is avoiding skeletons in your cupboard in the first place. "The superior pilot uses his superior skills to avoid putting himself in a situation that will need those superior skills"- an old adage.
      Simply put, "Prevention is better than cure."
      Abstain from all appearance of evil... (1 Thess 5:22).
      There's no excuse whatsoever on earth for a married person to keep a secret romantic relationship with the opposite sex...it is evil, ungodly, wicked, devilish, destructive, downgrading, catastrophic, deadly, poisonous, bitter, condescending and what have you...
      In fact, it is almost worse than physically murdering your spouse...
      It must be avoided like a plague, flea, canker worm and cancer.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

WHEN LOVE HURTS...

-
True love is not all about this "gooeey-gooeey" feelings, head in cloud 9, butterfly in stomach and staring into your beloved's eyes 24/7. Heavens knows I still have that "gooeey" feelings for my darling and honestly, his tall, slim frame never cease making my heart pant for him. I don't get bored being in his company. 11 years of knowing this cutie doesn't look like it, it's like...oh, it's like we just started! But love is also tough! There is something called tough love! That is what I want to talk about. The love that will last a life time will go through seasons and one of the seasons which most singles don't want to talk about, many married people avoid and most divorcees wished they had the wisdom to manage is the season of tough love! This is the season your partner stamps their feet and say, "NO honey, I'm not going to take this!" It's the season you go through your adjustment period; adapting to your spouse, cha...
Read more

Sexual Urges (yay or nay) 🤔

-
Image
You know there's a 'sincere' pleasure that emanates from sex, especially when the act is performed with somebody that you love, and not someone you are paid to have it with. Sex is something that not only transcends in the physical realm, but also in the spiritual realm. It is an established fact that a lot of us do have sexual urges (S.U), and they are just fine the way they are, in fact it is a sign that you are normal! I had a counselling session with a young man, and he open ed up and confided in me about his really ‘intense’ sexual urges,  which later led him into (pornography, masturbation, etc.)  in a bid to satisfy those urges, which is wrong by  the way .... And as a result of that, he th ought he was abnormal, because the whole thing i.e 'the feelings' were so intense for him. I had to assure him that the fact that he experienced all this S.U, only affirmed the fact that he was indeed normal, because this are things that God has put in us, so that at t...
Read more