ME, HUSBAND AND HOUSE CHORES...

Most of us grew up singing "Mummy in the kitchen cooking rice papapa! Daddy in the parlour watching film papapa! Children in the garden playing ball!"

This goes to say there was a time when household chores was an exclusive work of women and taking care of the kids. The world changed and due to the advancement women have started working in the offices and further have proved their expertise in every field. Housework is not the only thing where women proved their worth.

But still the household chores did not go away; they are still managed by the women in most houses. However, men have started realizing that helping their partner in the household chores will not endanger their manhood. Yes, doing house chores  doesn't make you less of a man.

While growing up I always assign chores to my immediate younger brother deliberately.

My mom raised him to sit in the room  while we labour for him to eat. On many occasions he would be watching TV, or praying in tongues and all but the moment we set the table , he switches to recites 2 Corinthians 13:14. Do you know what is written therein?

"The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Ghost, be with you all. Amen"

Laughs. He concludes his prayers at the sight of food. Interesting.

I effected the change and made him realised that women are not slaves. By constant scolding and nagging, He was taught how to help out in his own little ways. I am hoping his wife will thank me later.

Genesis  25:29 established that Jacob cooked.
" Once, Jacob was preparing a meal when Esau, exhausted, came in from outdoors." God's Word version.
KJV says he sod pottage while other versions says: he cooked stew.

Genesis 27:31-33 established that Esau could cook too.

I have always known that not only the girl-child must be taught how to do house chores, even the boy-child. And with this knowledge, I raised my little cousin. My children are in for it.

I believe there's a reason for times and seasons in life. It is to prepare us for the things to come.

Being a bachelor, is the season for men to learn how to take care of yourself and the house.
To cook, wash plates, do laundry, sweep, tidy up your environment, etc

That's why I pity engaged single ladies who go to do Weekend labours thereby preventing the brothers from learning.
I'm not surprised to have them nagging after the wedding as a result of the work load. The labour continues.

I heard many married men say "My parents never taught me how to do house chores while growing up, I found it hard helping my wife around the house"

Parents must get it right.

Guys re-groom yourself too
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How should men handle chores with their wives?

There's love in doing things together. Taking some burden off your wife is a good way to communicate your love to her. As a matter of fact, the love language of most women is ACT OF SERVICE.

I tell you house chores is work. It can weigh a woman down physically exhausted and mentally stressed.

Help your wife out in reasonable  ways.

I bet you want your wife to be healthy, attractive and lively. Take some troubles off her in the home labours.

Helps to some women could mean having you sit with her in the kitchen sometimes. You might not do anything in particular but chat her up. Hug and peck her, encourage her, steal some meat from the pot as she cooks etc Doing things together can also afford you the moments of bonding.

Splitting or sharing chores could help as both of you do what you are good at.
Some men are good organisers, great cook, etc. You can help in the area of your strength.
Helps could be to assist her in doing some chores as she is busy with other works, without her begging or requesting you to do it.
I personally appreciate helps unsolicited for. Smiling

You can help out with difficult tasks in the house or take turns on specific tasks.
Helping her to pump water.
Help the kids do their homework.
Get groceries on your way home.
Fix meal as often as possible. Etc

Of course, a woman shouldn't deny her husband sexual intimacy but I dare say that house labours is one of the major reasons why some Wives retire to bed like a wounded lioness every evening. She complains of tiredness and headaches.

The wisdom for the wives too is to prioritise your works, don't break down.

If having a house help works for you and your husband, you can consider it.

If not, do what is only needful at the moment.
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Sometime last year, I was ministering in a church and one married woman sought my counsel about her husband who doesn't help her out with anything in the house.

Thanks to the Holy Spirit.

I asked her if the man has been helping out before and she said yes.
I asked her what her attitude was at the time.

The truth is that she was always complaining about what the man is not doing right as he helped her out with house chores.
When he washes the plates, she complains he splashes water on the kitchen board. Smiling.

When he lays the bed, she doesn't appreciate him for the effort but always focus on the edge not properly tucked in. #metoo

Some women are like me, I would re-lay the bed, re-arrange whatever he helped me to organize, re-sweep the sitting room.
I later noticed he stopped helping me out. Laughs
After a dialogue, he told me how he's been helping and how I have been re-doing the task.

I learnt my lesson and I am very better now. I have the grace to overlook.

Politely ask for help.
Every woman must learn to appreciate the helps.

There is no chores that is exclusive to a particular gender.
Men, Helps shouldn't be rendered only when your wife is sick or pregnant.
The home belongs to both of you.

You are blessed.

Enjoy your marriage.

Esther Ebunoluwa Omoniyi